Digger Barbie's Lifestyle

After that first day of seeing what I thought was life size Barbie, I found myself even more determined to meet her and pick her apart. Maybe I just wanted to see her flaws because from a distance she seemed pretty damn perfect. Now first off let me clear somethings up here. Women can look at other womens appreances and comment without being thought of as wierd or lesbian men not so much. Men in general don't check out other mens clothes or appearances and compare notes. Or they do but don't admit it. Where as women we check out other women and make comparisons all the time. Sometimes it can be devistating and sometimes beneficial. Well enough about that. After about a week of standing around the kindergarten yard I was able to have a few conversations with Barbie. She was pretty vague which I thought very odd. But it just made me all the more determined to dissect her life. Whenever I asked a question I felt like I had to ask 10 more questions just to get the 1st one answered. What the hell was she hiding, and what was it about her that was so damn interesting. So far all I could gather is that she was taking courses to become a nurse, she lived in a condo in a nice area, her babies daddy walked off the planet after moving her here to Vegas, and she had no family here. I wondered so many things like how the hell she could afford such a bomb-ass car, and such nice clothes, and her hair and nails so perfect. I mean there are only so many questions you can ask a person before you start pissing them off and getting on there last damn nerve. But I was gonna find out. Here I was working two damn jobs just to support my kids and didn't have shit to show for all my hard work. I mean she just looked alittle to classy to be a stripper. I did wonder if she was a prostitute but she just didn't seem like she'd be hanging out at the local no-tell-motel. So I knew I was gonna have to dig alittle deeper (no punn intended). So I decided to invite her and her daughter over to my house for a play date. She gladly accepted and I was excited. When she showed up she looked so well put together for just wearing flip flops, jeans and a tee shirt. I was shocked when she handed me a beautifully wrapped horderve plate from PF Chang's. Considering I had only made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and whipped up some koolaide. Well, what can I say I'm a papper plate, plastic fork kinda gal. I was kinda surprised when I offered her something to drink and she declined as she pulled out a bottle of Pierre water from her Burberry bag. We sat in my backyard and watched all three kids run around and yell like fools. But as we made small talk it was as if she just couldn't relax. Finally, I just couldn't take it anymore I just had to know. So I bluntly asked her "how in the hell can you be so prefect". As soon as I said it I regreted it. But it was like word vomit I could not shut the fuck up. One stupid thing after another came out of my mouth. I am surprised she didn't run for the damn door, kid in tow.Or slap the shit outta me for being so damn rude. It shocked the hell out of me when she started tearing up and crying. I kept thinking which of my lame ass questions had caused her to cry. Was it "how do you always look so perfect, or how do you have such great clothes, or do you come from a rich family, or wow, how can I be more like you and less like me???" I felt that I had seriously wounded her in some way. And then there it went she told me "You have no idea who I am or what I am". I just sat there waiting for her to tell me she was a princess in hiding or the long lost daughter to some rich dude. But no no couldn't be that simple. She had to ask me if I knew what a gold digger was. I sat there looking kinda dumb going though my internal file cabinet in my brain. Searching for gold digger then oh yeah I got it I've heard of those ruthless women that chase professional athlete's and famous dudes for money. But for some reason looking at her it didn't seem to fit the image I had. And thats when I was invited to learn about the digger barbie lifestyle.

Sometimes the Grass is Greener

My daughter's first day in kindergarten was more exciting for me than for her, I think. I stood watching her and I felt so proud. I was sad that she would be away from me for two and a half hours but also alittle happy thinking about the things I could accomplish during that time. I was watching her enjoy herself with the other kids and I was checking out all the other parents. When I noticed a tall lady wearing black sunglasses and white track suit. My first thought was, seriously white track suit, she must be crazy cause no mother in her right mind with a kindergartener wears white. I stood there checking her out from head-to-toe. She had on a pair of silver flip-flops, her toes had a french manicure. The sweat pants were rolled at the bottom and she appeared alittle to tan for it to be natural. She was wearing a light pink tank top with silver rhinstones spelling out BeBe across the front. I could tell she must have had a boob job cause her boobs just looked alittle to good to be her own. From the toneness of her arms I could also tell she had to work out. Her nail bore a french manicure, but I was alittle to far away to tell if the nails were her own or not. Her hair was long and shiney, the kind I wished I had. She wore her blonde and brown highlighted hair parted in the middle and straight to the middle of her back. I couldn't tell if she was wearing any makeup or not because I was too far away and she had huge black sunglasses on. I noticed that for some reason she just looked out of place. She just looked alittle too good. She just stood there by herself watching her daughter. I noticed that all she was holding in her had was a cellphone and some keys. I remember thinking hmmm I wonder what kind of purse she carries. Did she leave it in her car? Did she walk here? I decided to be the friendly slash nosy person that I am and walked over to try and get the 411. Just as I walked over to say hi the bell rang and all the kids started running toward there classes. Once I turned around I caught site of the lady walking to the parking lot. Well I guess she did drive after all. I watched to see which car was hers and sure enough the black BMW with tinted black window she got into fit her appearance perfectly. I remember thinking that day, "I think I just say the real life barbie", bitch. When in reality I would have never guessed that I had just set my sites on a real life professional Gold Digger.